The Military's Best Kept Secret

How fitting it is to make my first contribution to this blog on Valentine's Day.  It may not yet be v-day for you, but as I am writing from South Korea I am a day ahead.  That's right people I am from the future!  I believe my views and perspectives will add an interesting twist to this blog because I am a military wife.  For the military wife love, sex, and everything in between are interrupted and battled by a whole new set of obstacles.  Take this special holiday for example. Couples everywhere are busy getting dolled up to go to dinner and get flowers and get it on.  Meanwhile, there are many women that are praying to see a dirty camouflaged man on skype tonight if the connection holds up.  Can you imagine buying yourself some sexy lingerie and prepping your bedroom for a little late night skype sex? Your husband has to hang up curtains around his bunk because that is as much privacy as he is going to get for 6 to 12 months.  He changed out of his sweaty uniform and put on some PT gear.  He plugs in his headphones so he can hear you talk dirty to him and moan but he has to type out his responses so his neighbors aren't in on the show.  You dance around the room moving the computer trying to find the perfect angle to shoot your very own porno for one.  Oh how romantic it is trying to be sexy for a computer screen.  You haven't seen awkward sex like this since you lost your virginity.  How do you make the first move when you can't even touch?  Eventually you work up the courage to give him a little strip tease.  I'll show you mine and you show me yours.   Then you feel a bit more confident so you start to do a little rubbing and touching.  Mutual masturbation ensues and hopefully since you are operating your own equipment you can both get the job done (easier said than done when you have an audience of confused dogs watching from the floor).  This is hardly a passion filled love making experience, and guess what?  He probably recorded your little show to refer to later!  While skype sex isn't always the most comfortable and certainly no substitute for the real thing, I think it inadvertently aided our sex life.  I think the biggest component to a healthy sex life is being able to be open and honest with your partner about what you want and like.  Masturbation, for me, has always been a private affair.  Being able to share that with my man made us both more open.  I mean seriously, once you've been spread eagle for a pinhole camera you are quite a bit more comfortable about the man seeing you with your PMS bloating muffin top.  The more comfortable you are with someone the more honest you can be both in and out of the bedroom and that is what makes a great relationship.  If you can't share all of your deep dark desires and secrets with the person you are with you are setting yourself up for a lifetime disappointment.  If  you keep faking orgasms how will he ever learn to get you off?  Years will build with resentment for all the things he never did, but really you should be mad at yourself for never giving him the opportunity.  The same goes for you fellas.  Instead of google-ing internet porn to satisfy your cravings and curiosity why not ask your lady to try some of those things?  When you love your partner you want to satisfy them and that alone should make you more open to trying new things.  Sometimes you'll find that what looked hot on redtube kind of sucks in real life but sometimes you'll end up exploring a whole new area of yourself and your partner you had no idea could feel so good!  Take the "Fifty Shades" serious for example.  Now I have to say the writing is pretty poor from a literary stand point, but who knew so many housewives wanted to be chained and whipped into submission?  So if this simple advice is working for men and women separated by continents and oceans just think of how successful it will be in your own home.  Take it from me, a well fed appetite has no need to wander. 

xoxo, 

Birdie